Welcome to the Doula Blog

Traci was recently featured on the “Birth Monopoly” podcast! In episode 11, Traci joined host Cristen Pascucci to discuss providing moms with information to make their own choices about their birth experiences. Traci talks about her unique role as an advocate and educator.

How many times have you seen (or maybe even posted) pleading questions in online doula groups that sound something like, “My client’s provider is showing all kinds of red flags! What do I do?” Maybe a client comes back from a prenatal appointment and reports that their provider won’t “allow” them to eat during labor. Or you’re in the birthing space and see the OB reaching for the scissors even though your client clearly communicated in their birthing plan that they do not want nor consent to an episiotomy.  Depending on your training, personal history, biases, and communication skills, it’s

What happens when you show up to a prenatal appointment and your favorite care provider in the practice says something that leaves you feeling stunned, betrayed, or feeling helpless? You have built what felt like a respectful, trusting relationship with this provider, and they’ve been so nice up to this point. Maybe you misheard it? Maybe what you were saying wasn’t clear. But, no. You confirmed your birthing choices with them and they said something like “I wouldn’t recommend that if you were my daughter…” or “you want to have a healthy baby, right?” Language matters and it can be

Good communication with your care team during pregnancy is an important start to building the foundation for your birthing goals, but you may be blindsided by a comment you don’t know how to handle. Maybe it’s not an extremely negative comment, but it still hurts none the less. Language matters. Words are strong. If your provider says any of these, it may be a red flag: We’ll talk about that later” when you’re talking about what kind of birth you’re looking for.  “Baby is looking big early in pregnancy.” Talk of induction early in pregnancy  Automatic cesarean when there are

So I heard a story recently that has my brain reeling.  During a birth, comments from a care provider about the baby “blowing out” mom’s vagina to then give her the option of forceps or cesarean  after only 30 mins of pushing and baby doing well.  Now, most of you know me well enough to know that I’m HUGE on informed consent and education, AND… THIS is NOT education nor a shared decision making process!!!! Not to mention studies show a forceps delivery can cause high perineal trauma and many, many risks to the baby, as well as risks with sections.

by Traci Weafer It’s all smoke and mirrors. I have a love/hate relationship with birth photography. It can capture the greatest images of a mother’s journey but also can give the illusion of what things are supposed to be. The perception of birth. What does that look like ? If you’ve never given birth before, this could be a dangerous place to be. Are you scrolling through images daydreaming about a birth that might not be in your cards? Birth can be glorious, magical, and an illuminating space between woman becoming mom, but what happens when it’s not? Are you doing it wrong? Why wasn’t your

A poem by Traci Weafer ​As a doula, I held you I held her in my arms and she criedMy arms open soft and wide Her tears I felt on my shoulder warmAs her heart in pieces forever torn They didn’t see a heartbeat, she saidAll the joy in her face turned to sadness and spread No words I had her heart would touchMy heart broke for her oh so much She needed me to just listen and beShe needed to mourn her child she would not see A Doula to give her compassion and graceTo flood the floor with

A poem by Traci Weafer ​I’m sorry I’m sorryI heard her voice quiver I cringed and a strong chill sent down my spine a shiver Why O why would you sorry ever beFor this is your safe place to labor wild and free No you are not as loud as you feelThe insides of you are screaming still On the surface your fear is the furthest from our sightA spirit of calm takes to the fight Your strength radiates as your body ripplesThe power you hold magnifies and triples. So when you think with vulnerable sighsI’m sorry I’m sorry hidden