Good communication with your care team during pregnancy is an important start to building the foundation for your birthing goals, but you may be blindsided by a comment you don’t know how to handle. Maybe it’s not an extremely negative comment, but it still hurts none the less. Language matters. Words are strong. If your provider says any of these, it may be a red flag:
- We’ll talk about that later” when you’re talking about what kind of birth you’re looking for.
- “Baby is looking big early in pregnancy.”
- Talk of induction early in pregnancy
- Automatic cesarean when there are other options available
- “I do not work with doulas….” This statement means this provider doesn’t understand the work of a doula and doesn’t care to find out.
- “I’ll let you.”
- “You’re not allowed.”
- “We’ll see.”
If you have or are hearing this type of language, I encourage you to evaluate your current provider situation. Open and honest communication is the key to a satisfying doctor-patient relationship. Don’t worry about wanting to “please” your doctor or being labeled as a “bad patient” by asking questions. Insist on having the discussions that are important to you.
When you are trying to obtain the best evidence based care prenatally, you and your provider should have discussions about your options that take your personal beliefs and preferences into account.
If you need further counseling, I offer a one hour session perfectly FREE.